“Trying to tolerate the intolerable will only erode your self-esteem, and you’ll see yourself as stronger in the past than in the present.”
When I read this line in a Steve Pavlina article the other day it struck a chord in me for some reason. I would like to add to it ‘…you will see yourself as stronger in the past and in the future, than in the present’.
Don’t we want to live in the Present, people? Don’t we want to be the strongest we can be NOW?!
How many of us go about our lives settling for ‘less than excellent’ (as David Wolfe loves to say)? Maybe it’s a less than excellent home situation. Get out. Maybe it’s a less than excellent relationship. Just get out of it, there really IS more to life. And you’ll find another guy/girl anyway, trust me.
Maybe your diet is rubbish and you’re slowly drifting down the ‘hill’ like when you’re on skis and you point them perpendicular to the slope (this is quite fun actually, can you tell I went for a skiing lesson the other month?!). Either way man, it’s time to get out.
What happens is that patience starts wearing thin you see. Maybe you were an incredibly patient person before you were forced to endure the intolerable for extended periods of time. I advocate patience of course, in excess. What I do not advocate though, is someone starting to feel weak because they find themselves feeling angry often.
When the intolerable rears its ugly head each time, the anxiety increases exponentially and starts to run away with both their sanity and, no doubt, their dignity. For the aftermath of anger rarely leaves us feeling very good about ourselves, does it?
So it seems we have three choices once we pin point the intolerable.
- Change it, diplomatically
- Change yourself, using care to not compromise on what is valuable to you
- Get rid of it, either by leaving or forcing it to be gone
I read ‘On the shortness of life‘, by the legendary Roman dude, Lucius Seneca yesterday. Again. I digress back to that whole notion of wondering why the profound epiphanies I seem to have, after reading such wholesome philosophies, are parked at the crappy-parking-next-to-the-pillar in the back of my mind’s parking lot mere minutes after…
Anyway, I absolutely love that essay. Do yourself a favour and take the time to sit it through. Get a tea (I couldn’t in good conscience suggest coffee, you know that!) and chill out for a half hour or so when you get a chance. The man has some excellent points. And who knows, maybe the epiphany will stick? Never give up!
And do stop tolerating the intolerable. It WILL erode your self esteem. You’ll have to take my word on that if you haven’t experienced it yourself yet.